A child is the apple of a parent’s eye. For the parent, nothing is good enough for the child. He must have the best clothes, the best education, the best of everything. In the process of providing all this, the child gets pampered. And if both parents go out to work, there will be the additional feeling of guilt that they are unable to spend time with the child. They try to make up for this lapse by indulging the child some more. In no time, the child learns how to get things done by emotional blackmail.

This will prove detrimental to the child’s welfare in the long run. He will surely not lack in things tangible. He may not lack even in knowledge. But he will fall woefully short in the ‘values’ department. Such a child will in all probability be a selfish brat, uncaring for others, arrogant, disrespectful. He will be a couch potato watching meaningless programmes on television and whiling away time idly with friends. The child used to having his own way at home may never learn how to handle any kind of failure and even as he achieves physical growth may remain an emotional cripple. Such may be the fate of a child with seemingly the best education that money can buy.

Parents will have only themselves to blame for such a state of affairs. Between spending all their time on earning as much as possible for the sake of the child and thinking that their child can do no wrong, they would have spoilt the child rotten. The solution of course rests with the parents themselves. They have to realise that the environment in which the child is reared, plays a significant role in moulding his character. They cannot shrug off their responsibility by just admitting the child to a prestigious school.

School may be good for theory but for practical lessons in life, the home is the best place and parents, the finest teachers. For best results of course, the parents have to lead by example. A lying parent cannot teach the child the value of truth, a lazy parent cannot teach the value of work. Formal education may provide the child the means of earning a living, but the parent has to teach the value of service, the joy of giving.

Many busy parents are clueless about their child’s activities. They may never even come to know that the child has fallen into bad company, has developed vices like addiction to alcohol and drugs until it is too late. This does not mean of course, that the child should be placed under surveillance and every activity of the child monitored. The child should be allowed the required freedom and should be given responsibilities he can handle. Parents shouldn’t be over-protective and should let the child learn from his mistakes.

The best legacy a parent can leave the child, is not physical wealth which can be lost easily. The real inheritance will be the values taught and the emotional strength instilled, which will stand in good stead throughout the child’s life.

Author: Pratibha Shenoy (Basavanagudi, Bangalore)

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