Many parents do not recognize the harmful effects of physical and verbal punishment. They don’t know that yelling, slapping, hitting, and spanking teach violence, destroy self-esteem, create anger, interfere with learning, and damage the relationship between parent and child. Discipline & Punishment are used interchangeably; punishment and discipline do not have the same meaning and do not serve the same purpose having most characteristics in direct contrast to one another. Most parents are not aware that unknowingly they are actually punishing their child while teaching them discipline lessons. Unfortunately, most current parenting books and articles recommend "alternatives" which in reality are merely alternative punishments. They never differentiate between Discipline and punishment. What is Discipline? Discipline is guidance. When we guide children toward positive behavior and learning, we are promoting a healthy attitude. Positive guidance encourages a child to think before he acts. Positive guidance promotes self-control. Different styles of discipline produce results that are different. Discipline requires thought, planning, and patience. Effective Discipline:The use of discipline is thinking and trying process. Remember: • Effective discipline is good for parent and child. • A child learns to take responsibility for his or her behavior. • The parent keeps a warm relationship with the child. • The goal is to teach the child how to behave, not to make the child suffer. What is punishment? Punishment is usually hitting, spanking, or any type of control behavior. Basically there are four kinds of punishment: Physical, with words, holding back rewards, and penalizing the child. Punishment does not promote self discipline. It only stops misbehavior for that moment. Punishment may fulfill a short-term goal, but it actually interferes with the accomplishment of your long-term goal of self control. What’s the Solution? True alternatives to punishment are those that help the child to learn and grow in a healthy way. … [Read more...]