Reading reports of honour killings in the papers, I can’t help wondering if we are living in the medieval ages. Killing your own children for the supposed dishonour brought upon the family by marrying outside the caste is not just despicable, it is downright barbaric. If these shameful acts were performed by illiterate folk in villages, where caste reigns supreme and khap panchayats lay down the law, it would still shock. But it is even more horrifying to know that educated people, who should have been open-minded, are doing very much the same thing. It is as if education does not make any difference to the way we think. In a country slated to be a super-power, a journalist with a reputed business paper is reported to have been killed by her mother for deciding to marry a person from another caste. Killing, of course happens is some rare cases when the daughter is murdered in cold blood, when she, the epitome of family honour crosses the line. But the lives of many children are sacrificed everyday when parents by force, by emotional blackmail, by threats of disinheritance, make their son or daughter marry a person of their choice. It is a common fact that a majority of marriages in 21st century India are the prerogative of the parents. Children today, have the right to decide on their education, on their career, on so many matters pertaining to their lives at least in urban households, but even now finding a life partner for oneself is out of bounds for many Indians irrespective of their economic and social background. The argument is that, in India, the system of arranged marriage has stood the test of time. This system may sound strange but there is not anything wrong with it per se. It is after all part of our culture. The problem starts when parents force this system on their children. They are very strict in this one matter. So a boy or girl may be very bold and independent minded in the workplace and elsewhere, but when it comes to marriage they are more than willing to toe their parents' line. We usually will have heard of at least one instance among acquaintances, where parents refuse to accept a … [Read more...]