Raising first-rate children with good parenting

How to rear children

  While I was researching for an article to write about parenting for my blog publisher, I was lucky to find one such book that is a current bestseller on the New York Times list of best selling books... “Ten Basic Principles of Good Parenting” by Laurence Steinberg and Laura Carnell and published by Simon & Schuster. The book was a revelation. It was so easy to understand and follow the advice that I highly recommend all parents to go through it just for the wealth of information inside it. But there was one sentence that caught my attention and made me think deeply. Most parents feel that they are inadequate as parents when they are overwhelmed by the problems they had to face while dealing with their children. According to Dr. Steinberg “There are no ideal parents anywhere!” He further goes on to add that all parents are good parents and there is never a parent that is ideal all the time. All parents can strive to be still better parents for now. Here is how he says it can be done. He formulates 10 rules to be observed while dealing with children...  How you treat your children is vital    Keep this rule pasted on your mind where you can see it all the time. How you react and treat your child will depend on what you want to get done from them every day. Remind yourself with the question “How will my child respond if I behave in a certain way?”  Remember there are no limits to loving your child  It should be noted that you cannot mess up your child with plain love. There is no limit to loving your child. You can ruin your child only by being too lenient when you should not or by giving too many material things, all but not by love alone.  Engage yourself with your child  For a parent, this is most important but can seem to be a futile task for many. Keeping time off for the child can mean changing of priorities for most working mothers and fathers in modern times. There is no alternative; you have to sacrifice some of your interests for their sake.  Keep pace with your parenting to match with your … [Read more...]

Kids or Super kids?

 Television abounds in programmes with children - dance shows, music shows and even serials with children as protagonists. Watch a children’s reality dance show. The chances are that instead of impressing, one will feel disgusted with the adult expressions and obscene dance steps of the little children in the course of the show. When the results are announced, the tension on their faces is palpable and one feels for those children, who at such a tender age, have already entered the adult world leaving their childhood behind.   Who is to blame? Of course, the media which exhibit these shows in the name of promoting young talent and the audience which loves these shows and loves controversies in them even better. But the primary blame rests squarely on the shoulders of the parents. Eager to watch their children on television, eager to exhibit the talents (whether they exist or not) of their offspring, they push them too hard into singing, dancing or acting. Pursuing these as hobbies is fine and to a certain extent necessary for the all round development of the child. But it is alarming to see the extent of expectations the parents have from their child. One even gets to see parents quarrel with the judges if their child loses out, setting a fine example indeed for their children. And the media shamelessly telecasts such appalling behavior, TRPs being the reason. The finer points of participating, competing fairly, putting in your best efforts and being graceful losers are lost. At a very young age, the child learns that winning is all that counts.    In the previous generation, parents laid great stress on the academic performance of the child. Other activities did not receive much encouragement. This built up undue pressure on the children to do well in school even if the subjects they were studying did not hold their interest at all. This state of affairs was bad enough, but today things are even worse. Doing well in your exams is of course a must. Other than this, the child should not only take part in several other activities be it drawing, swimming, chess or tennis but also should excel in all of them.Parents keep comparing … [Read more...]